Changes

Grabe I dont know what to feel right now. Honestly, I was trying to figure out bakit ganun? Hindi na ako nagseselos pero bagkus namimis ko sha mas mataas na ung feeling na mas gusto ko na lang sha makasama kesa magselos. This is a weird Ash. Might be that Im growing older? more wiser? It has been so long since I felt this way. I am secured with myself. I am more fierce and comfortable. Maybe this is the reason why jealousy is no longer present. I want to be jealous but there are no insecurities inside me that is creeping in my dark side. I am totally enjoying what I have now. Yes! there is so many scarcity but I guess I have totally live with it and its ok. I think this is God working on me, giving me the peace that I was looking for. For years, after the break up I have not been so fine myself. But now, it seems like I have really totally moved on and enjoy what this life has to offer. I am happy. I am content and I am losing weight! My family is totally just the same. The boyfriend well same old we are still "magulo" but heck I am ok with that as long as he respects me and treats me special Im ok with that. Some told me that loving is trust then I guess since trust is earned love is also earned. And love is given to those who deserve it. ^_^

Shopping Addiction

Today I want to shop but my budget says otherwise so instead of me trying to wallow that I cannot buy what I want today. I will just blog of what I feel. Honestly, I have wanted to buy a blush on for over a week the price of what I want is totally not expensive yet I am holding myself back not to buy that crazy blush. I don't know what it is that I want to buy it and case is I would not be satisfied not until I get my hands on it. As I am still mulling over which step should I do, I know for sure that this feeling should stop now! There are so many bills to pay and so many things that I must prioritize first but then again the hoarder in me is crying out, so loud that I could not ignore it anymore.

While writing this post, I have decided that I will buy the damn blush and go on with my life and enjoy it. This means that for the week, I will just have to diet myself which is way beneficial as I will just bring oats for breakfast and some yummy pack lunch. Though, lets see if the hoarder in me will win versus the lazy ass that I am. But still wishing that the lazy ass will win this battle. Haha!