Today I am feeling kinda blue. I am kinda sad and I am thinking what is happening with me. With all the blessings that God has given me why does my heart felt heavy?
I am thinking is it because I have experiencing monthly hormones or is it because I am sick? Or is it because my "Giver" type has taking its toll on me?
Hmmm... as I am typing these feelings that I have I have been also thinking why am I feeling this way?
Maybe because my feelings are not being address? I felt that I have been shrugging my feelings under the rug and I let people dictate how I should feel? Maybe I let people in so much that I start to care to which I should not anyway... or maybe because I have accepted another person in my life to which does not even think of me as a friend? Truth be told I felt that I have been somewhat betrayed. But actually betrayal wasn't even an issue because we aren't even close and maybe my expectation are too high that since it wasn't attained I get disappointed. Maybe that is the correct term I am disappointed with what I knew. And I think that I have been expressing myself wrongly. Maybe I am not still comfortable talking with the person that I am disappointed to that is why I feel like I am faking my convos with her. Somehow I know I will get through this and sort out my feelings towards her then eventually be comfortable with her again. So I guess, I just have to wait and let my feelings of negativity pass and be well again.
